*.* How God changed my life :) *.*
Hi everyone, I'm Yuxian from Nissi Knights and I'm here to share about how God have changed my life.
I come from a family who places alot of importance on money. My parents would raise my 2 siblings and myself to do well in our studies, so that we can secure good jobs in the future. My family also believes in using "Spartan education", so I will receive a lot of caning and scolding whenever I didn't do well in tests and exams. Displaying negative emotions like sadness and anger are also now allowed in my family. So the more I cry the more I get caned. I would receive verbal insults like "I don't belong to my family", "that I was picked up from the trash/an accident" and my parents would tell me that they love my siblings more then me.
I wasn't in a good relationship with my family, my dad used to tell me what a failure I am, I don't talk to my brother and my mom and sister took control of most of my life. They would decide on every decisions of my life. They would disapprove any friends I make and they don't allow me to spend time with my friends, thus I must rush home everyday after school.
So to survive in this family, I learnt to be the quiet and obedient child. In the eyes of my family, I'm never good enough, a weakling, a fearful crybaby. Eventually, due to my over obedience, I also become a target to let my family vent their unhappiness.
Deep inside I begin to develop this hatred towards my family. I hate my mother's and sister's constant caning and control and I hate my father and brothers neglectance. During my secondary school years, I spend every night planning on how to murder my family, I spend endless nights crying myself to sleep. I became a very morbid, suicidal and grumpy person.
God created me to have an overpowering sense of imagination and creativity, I will imagine myself to be in my own fantasy land where I am the lead character and I take control. I eventually begin to let my imagination to take life. I begin to see 6 different imaginary friends, the first is an athelete who is smart, second is a playboy who is a glib talker, third a popular kid who is nice everyone, fourth an angry vulgar punk, fifth a gentle brotherly figure, lastly a man with a 6 years old mentality.
Each of them took a form of someone I wish to be. These friends have a few common triats, they love me despite I'm a nobody, they all are successful and they hate their family, they are godless people who hates god for bringing us to life to suffer. So these friends are customized to suit me and provide the love my family couldn't
These friends begin to take a life of their own and they became a major part in my life. I would converse with them, they would teach me math, cheer me on when I'm running 2.4km. I became obsessed with them. Slowly, I begin to pick up habits from these friends, I think like them and talk like them.
During Sundays, my family are all away from home and I'm alone. I would enjoy Sundays gorging myself with loads of food and imagine myself to dine with these friends. There are times where I eat 7 person's serving worth of food a day and eat even more when I feel depress. Some of them begin to advice me to run away ditching my family when I become successful. Some told me to murder my family to vent this anger and sadness. Some are there just to let me indulge in my own depression.
I was wasting my life away until I've meet God 3 years ago when my part time job friend brought me to Christ. Knowing God exposed to me a whole new different type of love. I begin to experience true love from my life group, for the first time in my life, I felt accepted. God revealed to me that deep inside, these "love and companionship" that my imaginary friends provide couldn't satisfy that love I'm looking for, its a love only God can provide. A love that forgives and doesn't harm me or others, a love that is pure.
Don't get me wrong, things never change instantly after I've receive Christ into my life. But God showed how to live my life correctly. He showed me the consequences of sin slowly and showed me that some of my habits are wrong and harmful. The changing process is slow. From a boy who have 0 sense of worth to a boy who now sees himself as a child of God.
God begin to teach me how to love and forgive my family. I learn to pray for them and God slowly answers my prayers. My relationship with my sister and mother is much better then previously. Recently, once a while, my mum would initiate light hearted conversations with me. Its might not seem like a big thing to you all, but my mum had never talk to me like this in my life before. Slowly, I begin to love my family now and praise God, I've never had a murderous intent for my family for the past 2-3 years.
Now that I've experience God's love, I tried to avoid my "imaginary friends" at home. But through one of pastor's sermon last year, God revealed to me that I need to expose my past to light. I've hide this secret past from my life group who loves me because I'm afriad to be looked at differently by my life group members. But everything changed when God gave me the courage one Saturday to consult pastor about my past and my eating disorder and He arranged a prayer session for me with a few leaders.
God revealed to me that my imaginary friends turn out to be just like my family. After the arrangement was made and just before the session, my imaginary friends turned against me. They begin to insult and threatened me that night. But after that night of prayer, God broke my chains away from these "friends", till now I've never sense their presence again. I begin to learn to kick away my habits of addiction of porn with the help of my life group members and I've learn to eat normal. Due to the heavy influence of these bad habits, the process of changing was really tough and I fell from time to time. But God never give me up. He never did. In fact, he have made greater plans for my life.
Due to my "over active" imagination, one of my biggest ambitions is to learn animation, but my parents always object me pursuing arts because they believe it wouldn't earn money. But God never let this dream die. During the sermon, "the day the sun stood still", I was given a piece of yellow paper to write my bold prayers. This is what I wrote down, "I want to start up the very first Christian animation studio in Singapore for God." 2 weeks later, I was told to make a video for Pastor's birthday, which eventually leads to me serving now in word aid and impact live. I am still amazed by how God turned my life around, my imagination and creativity was no longer used to bring myself harm but God used it for his purpose.
I believe that if we really trust our life to God. God will surely bless all of us for his great purpose :) Thank you.
Yuxian.
I needed Jesus @ | 9:12 PM
*.* How God helped Kakak and Her Family :) *.*
Hellos everybody, I’m jiehao and I’m here today to represent my Life Group Nissi Knights to give thanks to God and how He had used us to impact a widow and her 3 kids.
It all started when one of my LG member Jerrold read the Newpaper on the 21st May 2010. ( Gesture to the screen as the article is being flashed) Should I read through certain important parts of the article with them like 68k debt and stuffs? As Jerrold read all these, he was filled with compassion for them. And it was at this moment that God spoke to him, as Christians, we seemed to be always “hiding” in our comfort zone in Church and life group rather than going out to impact the world out there. Coupled in with the recent series of living an extraordinary life, Jerrold really felt challenged by God to do something extraordinary to love and meet the needs of this family. Although the life group really has no idea how to help this family or contact this family, we decided to just go ahead and do it!
And around the 2nd week of June, we finally got hold of the widow’s address and we visited her at her home in Ubi. The first visitation was discouraging because the widow and her kids were not at home when we visited them. After talking to the neighbours to find out more about the situation of the family, we decided to buy some food and leave them at the doorstep of the house. At that particular moment, some of us were quite discouraged because we didn’t get to play with the kids and to talk to the widow. However, a few of us went to visit again the next evening to see whether she’s at home a not. And this time round, the kids and their mother were at home! We were shocked and so excited at the same time as we finally have the opportunity to speak to them and reach out to them! BUT, we were faced with a BIG problem- LANGUAGE BARRIER. The widow can only converse in Bahasa Indonesia although she can understand simple English and mandarin. Using simple English, friendly hand gestures and a lot a lot a lot a lot of smile on our face, we told them that we are here to help them and we want to care for them and give the kids tuition and stuffs! The kids and the widow were quite receptive to us and we really felt encouraged by them.
After we went home that day, we quickly gathered children’s clothes from different life group members and also got an Indonesian Christian friend to visit with us the next week so that we can communicate better and know her needs more clearly. The subsequent visits were productive as we begin to set up duty roasters to visit the widow every Tues evening bringing small little goods like milk and whatnot to give her every week. Tuition was also being given to the kids by some of the LG members weekly.
However, we quickly realized that we are focusing too much on meeting the physical needs of the widow and neglecting her needs as an emotional being. ( Eg. Our normal routine of visitation is always bringing clothes, giving of small little food items, asking her about the application of her visa and stuffs) We realized that as we meet her physical needs(which is very impt for her situation) , we are not loving her enough as a person and showing God’s love and care for her. That’s where God being to change the way we look at this project as we seek ways to care for her and find out more about her interests and to treat her like our elder sister because she is only 30years old this year.
And that is also when she requested us not to call her auntie anymore but call her ‘kakak’-meaning elder sister in Bahasa Indonesia. We also begin to substitute the word WIDOW with kakak in our LG because we don’t want to always associate kakak with the label of widow but we want to love her and treat her as a person Jesus loves. More breakthroughs were to come as kakak begin to share with us her worries and concerns and also her likes and dislikes. And that is when we found out that she’s actually a Christian when she’s younger but something happened and she stopped going to church. It was at this time that we realized that our purpose of visiting kakak is not only meeting her physical needs and emotional needs, but most importantly, she needs the love of Jesus and only Jesus can meet and provide for all her needs.
At this point of time, we also begin to realize the difference between volunteers and us Christians is not the money, milk, tuition, kong guan biscuit that we gave, because all of us gave the same things. So what is the difference? The Difference is the love of God. We need to love them with the love God has given us and also tell them about the love that Jesus has for them. From then on, the Indonesian translator Stephen begin to bring Christian tracks for kakak and we also decided to pray for kakak everytime we visited her.
It’s not been easy for the LG for these past 2 and a half months as we travel all the way from cck and even from JB to Ubi, but as a LG, Many of us had changed from being inward looking to more outward looking as we served and visited kakak. We believed that it is more blessed to give and to receive and we really enjoy ourselves playing with the kids and travelling there. And like what Pastor Chris has said last week, we are city on a hill that cannot be hidden. As Christians, I believe that we should continue to shine God’s light in our city by impacting the lives that are around us. There might not be widows in every neighbourhood but I believe that there are a lot of our friends and relatives that also need the touch of love in their lives. Before I end, 15 August 2010 which is tml, 10am, kakak, edo, jenny and yao wei will be visiting the Indonesian service at the Indonesian translator’s church! Praise God! And let’s give God the glory as He is the God of love and the One who provided the translator, the wisdom and the love to take care of them for these past few months!
Kiat Hau.
I needed Jesus @ | 9:05 PM
*.* My Dream *.*
Just wanna share with you guys how God has helped me in pursuing my dream.
(Written on the day I receive my letter of acceptance)
I’m looking at the medicine brochure hanging over my desk now. I have a habit of hanging my goals over my desk. Yes, going into medicine is my goal, and becoming a doctor is my dream!!
And I can’t believe I’m seeing my dream coming true now. It’s really amazing!
I know I didn’t have a perfect “A” level result to start with. But God gave me a chance to go interview. Thank God.
When I was preparing my portfolio, I realized I need to have two recommendation letters. I had no clue how to do it. But God provided, and he provided more than enough. I got three recommendation letters in the end, two from my teachers, one from a doctor. Thank God.
When I went for the interview, I said being a doctor is my dream, and I’m very interested in learning the human body and different diseases, but most importantly, I have the passion for healing the sick.
I told them I want to specialize in oncology as cancer is the leading cause of death in most countries, and I wish to come up with some cures in the future. And as they bombarded me with all sorts of unexpected questions, I’m amazed that I didn’t blank out but I still smile at them and said, “Okay, that’s a very good question.”
Even till now I can’t figure out how I managed to be so cool and composed at that moment. I know it could only be God who taught me how to answer those questions. Thank God.
Frankly speaking, I didn’t feel good after the second interview. I thought I had screwed it. The interviewers shot me that all my imaginations on what a doctor should be is simply too idealistic. What if I go into the real world and realize it’s not what I’d pictured.
I was shocked to hear that and I started to see how naïve I had been to think everything would be perfect. Then I told them that now I still don’t know what will happen in the future, but even it turn out to be the opposite of what I’d imagined, I’ll take responsibility of my own decision and I won’t give up what I’m doing.
Then they gave me that “are you sure?” look and my heart just sank. And I thought, oh no, I’m doomed.
But it turned out that things are fine, they just give me that skeptical look to see how I react. Thank God that I didn’t freak out and start hyperventilating in my seat. Thank God that I could still smile and say” thank you” when I left. Woosh!
Then comes the essay test. I can’t help but to get a little demoralized when I see how many people were there. It’s like the world is there on the test day.
I got more demoralized when I flipped the paper and saw the question. I’m like, Huh?! WHAT IS THIS?!! I mean that’s the last thing I’m expecting from them.
They asked on research limits, integrity and your own experience. I have no idea how to write. And I started to regret why I hadn’t take part in any sTAR research programme in school.
Then I sulked for a while and started writing. I didn’t even bother to plan! I just wrote whatever that comes to my mind. I didn’t even bother to check my grammar or sentence structure. When they said time’s up, I just managed to write down the last word.
Before handing up, I flipped through and to my horror; I realized I had written altogether 7 pages, without even knowing what exactly did I write! And I thought to myself, oh well, I think I just crapped my way through in a test like this!
Thank God that He had taught me to write those things I can’t even remember writing. It looks like it’s not crap after all. Thank God.
Then comes the waiting part. Honestly, I have to say; it doesn’t feel good at all. It’s torturing.
I check my letterbox up to 3 times a day. And each time is disappointment and more disappointment. My faith even started to sway when I heard that some of my friends have already been offered to medicine.
I had a good friend, Saradha, who also applied for medicine. I had previously prayed that, even if I can’t get in to medicine, I wish she could.
Then this morning she text me and said she got in! I was so happy for her and I thank God for answering that prayer.
Then I started to get a little worried. Why I haven’t gotten any reply yet?
God has brought me so far and He’s not gonna leave me hanging there right?
So I prayed, God! Let me get in to medicine!!! Make it happen!!
It almost sound cliché because when I on my laptop and logged into my account, I see the page reading” Congratulations! You have just been offered to the faculty of medicine in academic year 2010/2011”.
I was totally stunned!!!
I stoned for about 30 seconds and I started to cry in front of the laptop! I just can’t believe my eyes! How can God hear and answer my prayer so fast! He’s just amazing!
Now you must know that each year 2000 over people apply for medicine, 800 will be shortlisted for interviews and essay, but only 240 are offered in the end.
I didn’t have a perfect result; I didn’t have amazing testimonial or CCA records, I didn’t have wonderful recommendation letters; I didn’t have outstanding achievements; I didn’t even have clinical attachment or scholarships.
Why would they, of all the equally deserving candidates out there, choose me?
The answer is simple. It’s God. It’s God who has provided everything for me. It’s God who has made the impossible possible. When I did my “natural”, he’d done the “super” for me! All glory goes to Him! Thank you God!
I’d like to end off by telling you guys that, when you place your dream in God’s hands, and by doing your best and trust Him totally, He can make your dream come true.:)
XiaoYe
I needed Jesus @ | 11:36 AM
*.* Cabby Midnight *.*
Xup man, just got back from a movie called robin hood.
It is late at night around 11:45 i decided to take a cab back
Surprisingly the cabby was not the usual quiet one but sparked a conversation with me on the singapore casino IR
From then i knew that something was up and a door was flinging widely open for me to enter
So i decided to take it instead of my usual sleep
I decided to use the conversational evangelism that was taught by pastor dave
After talking awhile on the IR, this was our conversation
Me: Uncle, are you buddhist or freethinker?
Uncle: Freethinker
Me: How come never go temple?
Uncle: Got go abit lah with family cause family buddhist mah
Me: How come you not buddhist?
Uncle: All religion are the same, all teach to do good
Me: Uncle i got a question, if all religion are good, how do you know which one goes to heaven?
Uncle: I dont know, it depends on what each one believes. How do you know which one?
Me: Not sure ( im lying hahahahaha)
Silence for 2 min
Uncle: What do you believe in?
Me: I believe in Jesus, but not because i do good even though do because do lah but because God loves me.
Uncle: You got try other religions ?
Me: yeah , i was a freethinker, then buddhist, the taoist, then muslim, then freethinker. It was until my friend brought me to church then i got to hear about Jesus who came to earth to show love by dying for our bad deeds. So because of that i become Christian
Uncle: If you were a muslim, how did you change?
Me: It was only for a short while, go in early go out early can what. Same as other religion, read book, rise in rank, same thing lah.
Me: Uncle, how come the other religion never talk about buddha loving us or guanyin or shiva loving us at all?
Uncle: I dont know lah but its all about people choosing what they want,its all about their life...
Me: Yeah its depends on whether they choose to do good or not
Uncle: Correct thats why its up to them to choose
Me : Uncle got try other religion before?
Uncle: My friend got bring me to church before
Me: How was it?
Uncle: It was ok , like i said all religion the same ah people argue here and argue there, say this good also not good say this wrong also not good. Therefore dont say better.
Me: Its up to them to see and choose lah
Uncle: Yeah its up to them to choose
Reached home, seed planted
All wells that ends well
Im not sure if you see it as i see it
But i think its good
I needed Jesus @ | 12:24 AM
*.* Scholarship application *.*
Dear all,
Mr fat and fast here. I'm here to talk about my scholarship application process. HAHAS! actually im supposed to apply for my scholarship last week when the window was opened. However, i procrastinated and was wondering should I apply for this window or wait for the next window. And also, i did not really make that effort to find out how to apply and i don't know how to also. HAHAS. As such, I did not apply for the scholarship at all within the stipulated deadline. HAHAS! The deadline was actually on 9 May. Then on this Weds, 12 May, i was chatting on facebook with one of my senior from my school. He's kinda one of my best friends in Campus crusade and I always ask him for advice for studies also. Then he told me to faster go and apply scholarship also. After talking to him for so long, I FINALlY and reluctantly went to the SMU website and TRIED to apply. Zero sense of urgency. haix. But when my senior told me how to apply already, I was actually quite excited. hahas. that was WEDS, 1640. hahas. the window was still opened and i could still submit the application. My senior said it's better to send an email to the relvant department to confirm and ask them whether will they accept my application. As a obedient boy, Mr fat and SLOW decided to send an email to ask for another chance to apply, and my reason was personal negligence. HOHO!
At this point of time, any logical person would definately apply while waiting for the mail. but Mr fat and SLOW didn't. because he's lazy to write the long essay(actually it's not that long)and he cites timing as an issue because he got to go prayer meeting already. Lo and behold, the department emailed me back that evening and told me they will go and ask if the extension was possible. I was so happy when I heard that! thank God! hahahs. so i had a goodnight sleep and went to work the next morning, knowing that God will help me. HAHAS!
When I reach office the next morning, I saw an email from the incharge for the scholarship application.
From: Felicia GOH
Sent: Thu 5/13/2010 9:18 AM
To: SIAW Kiat Hau
Subject: RE: Scholarship application
Hi Kiat Hau
Thanks for your email.Please let me know your reason for not being able to apply before the stipulated deadline.
Regards
Felicia
Oops! I was thinking die already. HAHAS! my reason is personal negligence, any smart person would know the school will not allow a lazy and blur person to apply for SCHOLARSSHIP when he missed the deadline. Haix. At that moment, i struggled with the temptation of trying to lie and beautify my excuse so they will allow me to apply. The temptation lasted 5 secs when I contemplated to weave fairy tales and logical stories like I was overseas or blah blah blah.. HAHA. But i know that would not work cause im sure they will ask for the passport photocopy to prove or what. Then I decided to honour God and be honest, though i know the chance of them allowing me to apply will be almost zero if i'm honest. but well, honour God and being truthful is more important yar. AMEN! HAhass. so I wrote an email.................hohos!
From: SIAW Kiat Hau
Sent: Thursday, May 13, 2010 10:44 AM
To: Felicia GOH
Subject: RE: Scholarship application
Dear Ms Felicia,
I've actually encountered some difficulty understanding the criterias of the submission and I was unsure of the procedure to apply for the scholarship through oasis until my senior helped me about it yesterday. Coupled in with the start of my internship last week, I was unable to clarify and enquire about the criterias on time. Basically, i could have been more active and it's my negligence that caused me to miss the deadline. yup.s
Yours sincerely,
kiat hau
HAHAS. ok la, I admit I tried to beautify my excuse abit. But I did admit that it's my negligence la. HAhAS.so i sent the mail. woohhoos! yupssy.
Then the reply came yesterday................................it's coming,
From: Felicia GOH
Sent: Thu 5/13/2010 1:46 PM
To: SIAW Kiat Hau
Subject: RE: Scholarship application
Hi Kiat Hau
Noted, we’ll extend the deadline for you.
Please put in your application and let me know when you have submitted it.
Thanks.
Regards
Felicia
WOW!!!! God is awesome when you are being honest and just admit it's ur fault of being lazy and unsure of how to apply. HAHAS!. so siawkiathau happily applied and thank God! What is even more amazing is that the school sent out a mass email again to say that they will extend the dateline to 16 May!!! hahahsssaa. perhaps it's to be fair to the rest cause they exended for me.? (though my bro says perhaps alot of ppl also emailed them, but I believe it's God who works for me. hahas) WOWWWWW!!!! so awesome. i really think that it's God who works for my good. i really thank God because when we are honest and honour God and be frank, God's favour will definately be upon You! and it's not even whether I will get the scholarship anot, but it's about God loving me and giving favour to me although Im lazy and don't deserve it! thank You Jesus! praise You God. i love You too. HAHAS! i will apply duly the next time round.
Yours sincerely,
Mr Fat & Fast
aka
Handsomely Cutes
Mr Siaw Kiat Hau, Julian
I needed Jesus @ | 11:55 AM
*.* Repaid evil with good *.*
Xup man, today was the toughest day of one of my army life
Today when i was in the toilet i was humiliated by my army mates with the worst things boys can do.
I was really pissed and that was when the battle started for me
My anger quickly came into play and i was so filled with hateful thoughts that every thought was filled with pure bloodlust. I dont think it seems quite believable but those who knew me way before knows that i was a bloodthirsty anarchist so yeah
I had such murderous intent that even the nearby people around me could feel the fear of being killed in my thoughts.
It was then i remembered the sermon on forgiveness that God forgave us for our sins
And to forget His forgiveness is like forgetting my own face after looking in the mirror a second ago.
God reminded that i am His son and that He is well pleased with me. He told me to forgive which was the hardest thing to do. As my old nature started voicing out to me to kill and rip them apart.
BUT
BUT BUT
Thank God that He is in charge always and not me. The Lord gave me strength to hold back my anger and hatred and to cast them out in the Name of Jesus Christ. ( Beautiful Name isnt it)
Afterwards i still had the evil feelings but my thoughts were clear and focused on God. It took me a while to settle down and even now i can see the scar left.
However i no longer feel the same pain and anger as i did back then which ironically is this evening.
I thank God that though i see that scar i am able to show grace and forgiveness when the time really called and that i am still able to be who I am called to be. I thank God that i did not sin because of that and stood firm in the faith and In His Name, i know i did right thing and made Him proud.
I know i refused to sin at that time and overcame this battle
I thank God that God is God
I thank Him that i am now made stronger than before because of what He has done to me
And I say. Praise God for He is God and I am not
For He is the Gracious and ever Loving God that shows mercy to the enemies
For when justice demanded blood, He gave Himself as the ransom for us and for that i can say proudly My God avenges and i dont need to kill any longer
PRAISE GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I needed Jesus @ | 11:09 PM
*.* God's ways are higher than my ways *.*
Matthew 17:20 says this "...if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you."
Just how God answers prayers! I'm stil reeling from the excitement that I finally got the Offer from Acceptance for the NTU Computer Science course.
Looking back, I realised how God answers prayers in unique ways. My A-Level results weren't that fantastic to start with. With my results, I was barely able to make the cut-off for the unpopular university courses, let alone try apply the hotly-contested courses. Since I'm interested in computing and software programming, I decided to give it a try.
To be honest, I have never really placed total trust in God, even with my university application. I tried to take things in my own hands, attending university Open Houses with my parents, even skipping church on one of the saturdays (this is not encouraged, though). As I asked the university staff of my prospects of entering the Computer Science course, their common answer was "Chances are rather low, but no harm trying.". I was certainly discouraged, bearing in mind that Computer Science had the lowest cut-off amongst the courses I applied for. Still, I went ahead and applied. I even went to the point of submitting for Discretionary Criteria (by which universities admit up to 10% of their intake that failed to meet the cut-off), getting my secondary school teacher to submit an Appraisal Evaluation on my behalf.
As the days ticked by, I would check my email daily in hope of any signs of reply from NTU. With each passing day, I was getting more discouraged as other fellow A-level in my workplace and my JC classmates had already recieved Offers of Acceptance, yet I was still without reply from NTU. I resigned to my fate and could only pray for God to provide the place in university. As working fatigue overtook me, the university application became more distant in my mind, and it was only after a few days ago that I suddenly remembered about it. Still, I thought that I would certainly be one of those who would have to depend on luck to be admitted via the Dicretionary Criteria. It was just an hour ago that my mum received a letter from NTU in my mailbox, and there was the Offer of Acceptance! Just can't express how overjoyed I was to have God answer my prayer in such a way.
Even as I write this testimony, I am convicted by the Holy Spirit of my lack of trust in God during this journey in university application. If only I could trust God with the university application from the start! So I encourage you, as I remind myself, to put your trust in God. It may be the most doubtful thing to go though, a certain failure, but if only you put that little trust you have left in God, as Jesus promised, faith as small as a mustard seed moves mountains. That little perservence could well make the difference - you never know. Because our God is unpredictable - He answers prayers in His own unique ways.
Ernest
I needed Jesus @ | 7:28 PM
